A WOMAN who was repeatedly cheated on and down-trodden by her husband claims she regained her sanity after embarking on a sexy affair with a man from her gym.
Shelly Seager’s “revenge affair” ended in divorce but the 47-year-old claimed it also turned her life around and gave back her self-worth.
Shelly, a sales support executive from Bournemouth, was deeply unhappy with her husband who had cheated on her more than ten times in their marriage.
Shelly said: “When I had my revenge affair against my cheating ex – who’d had at least ten affairs that I know of during our fifteen year marriage – it brought me back the Shelly that I knew.
“For years, I’d been downtrodden, made to feel that no other man would ever look at me and been told by my ex-husband Thomas*, who ran his own online business, that ‘I was lucky to have him’.
“I’d put up with the lies, the cheating, the deceit and the put-downs for years – and at last I was sleeping with a man who told me I was beautiful, clever and fascinating.
“He gave me back the courage to totally change my life and boot out my cheating ex.”
Thomas and Shelly met through work and when they first started dating he was loving and attentive.
Shelly said: “But then after about ten years – although the affairs may well have started much earlier – little things started to alarm me.
“He was putting himself forward for courses at work, meaning he was away a lot. He was very evasive when he came back about what he’d been doing, and who he was seeing.
“Then there was a foreign trip to Portugal with a pretty female colleague, and when he returned he had pictures of her in a bikini, looking dreamily at the camera.”
These red light signals put Shelly on edge but it wasn’t until she found a restaurant receipt in Northampton, when Thomas had said he was somewhere else, that she felt she had the proof she needed to confirm her fears.
She said: “As ever when I confronted him he became angry and said it was all in my head, I was deluded and suspicious – he claimed to have picked up a hitchhiker and had to drive her to Northampton!
“He’d always create a row so he could storm out, then I’d be left shaken, alone and terrified about my future.
“We had a lovely big house, a luxury lifestyle and he would say, ‘This is all down to me, you’d be nothing without me’.”
The stress of the situation caused Shelly to become ill, she was nervous and depressed and even went to see a GP as she started to doubt her own sanity.
But things turned around when Shelly met a man at her gym.
She said: “I’d known him to say ‘hello’ to for years, but one day a couple of years before the end of our marriage in 2008, he asked me out for a drink.
“I said yes. We met, we chatted, he complimented me and I felt wonderful. But he was also married. I knew it was wrong, but we started an affair.
“I positively bloomed. To have a man telling me how lovely I was, making me feel like a sexy and desirable woman totally turned my life around.”
After a while Thomas discovered Shelly’s affair and was furious.
She explained: “He told my lover’s wife what was going on. But by now I had the courage to realise I had to leave and stand up to him.
“I left our lovely house, and changed my career. My lover supported me through the split, but we realised we could not carry on.
“He still loved his wife – they’d been married for 25 years. So he returned to her, and I carried on my life alone.
“Today, I’m still alone – but I am so much happier. I’ve done things I never thought I would do – I’ve travelled, I’ve started doing some acting and even appeared in a video with David Essex!
“My revenge affair empowered me. – revenge affairs set you on an equal footing and give you back control. I don’t regret mine for a moment!”
* Thomas’ name has been changed